Am I knowledgeable or a snob?

I’ve done it again.  Returned back from my summer holidays last weekend, only to admit to myself – again- that I’m simply not ready to return to work and I promptly left for a last minute few days in Tuscany.  This is after visiting the coastlines of Rimini, Salerno, Calabria and Sicily.  All this summer.  

So I’m sitting here, sipping some prosecco, thinking hmm, this beach is better than the one in xx, but prices are a bit pretentious, considering the sea doesn’t really compare to yy. And then I think that I really sound like a snob. Or is it an objective evaluation of the facts, based on knowledge? And is it ok to pass a judgment? 

Since I moved to Italy few years ago, I have spent every single possible bank holiday, national feast and annual leave here. In Italy.  Driving, flying, renting cars, anything that gets me around. The thing is, I am restless. My active mind, after two days on an amazing beach, will start wondering what’s around the corner. So I can safely say that I have seen more of Italian cities and beaches than majority of my Italian colleagues and friends. Their pattern on the whole seems to be this: one week around June time abroad – anywhere from Greece to Mali.  And then The-Main-Summer-Holidays in August ( and many Italians will have the whole month off) in Italy. In the same place. On the same beach. Eating with the same friends in the same restaurants. Every year.  This comes, of course, with great benefits, like familiarity, predictability, long term friendships, best umbrella on the beach and maybe good discounts. 

Me instead, I’m hungry to see always something new. Like last year, when I rented a car for two weeks and literally made a full circle of Sardinia.  Started from the south, travelling through the vast, very wild ( and very empty) beaches of the west coast. Then the north is like a jewel box, the sea sparkles like deep blue emeralds, surrounding beaches like white pearls. And then the drive south along the east coast, through mountain ranges that FEEL ancient.  I’ve never felt an earth feel so…settled. This country tells you that all that malarkey with tectonic movements is for youngsters, it’s now unwaveringly and comfortably exactly how it wants to be and will stay this way, thank you very much.  And then you hit the sea, which is so transparent, that it looks the boats are floating on air. I also made a friend for life, and experienced random events like the grilling of about 50 piglets for a village feast. 

My point here is that over the last few years I really have seen more of the Italian beaches and coasts than an average Italian, so I guess my factual critique has some basis. 

It reminds me of a completely different situation. At this year’s Venezia Carnevale, more than once, I caught myself very critically (read negatively) appraising other’s costumes, due to the lack of quality in design, fabric, added details or general thought that went into it, or rather not in many cases.  For those of us who have fallen in love with such historical events, it’s so much more than just the costume. It’s the hunt for the 1700s replica of a pocket watch ( as sadly I don’t have the $36k to bid for the original).  It is my lovely friend Vicki, in full historic dress, on a gondola, sporting sunglasses- which is just all right, as they are a replica of the original design worn by Thomas Jefferson.  So of course we inwardly cry and bit our imaginary knuckles, when we see a man in French Revolution ill-fitting rented outfit with black trainers on. Oh The Horror.  

The way I see it, whether it’s beach or an historical apparel, or anything else I appreciate, it’s good to become knowledgeable about it.  To learn it’s history, the links, the people and their lives.  Because I darn know it enriches mine, and then when I say something really is top notch, I know what I’m talking about.  

Why am I doing this?

As I’m about to press the proverbial button and publish my first ever blog, I’m asking myself: why are you doing this, girl?

First answer that springs to mind is that I like the intellectual challenge.  It’s something new that I’m working out as I go, both from a technical point of view (I never really knew what a platform is, now I do), as well as from the point of ability to write.  Seems obvious, but as many creative people with keen and fast mind, I think much faster than I can write. Hence the illegible scribbles that baffle even me.  Slowing down the stream of thoughts, giving them shape and form ( and I’m definitely not talking bullet points or mind maps), gives me a wonderful mental exercise.  

So why not do this in private? By publishing my nightthinking and daydreaming, am I really trying to show off? I don’t think so, as I’m definitely not feeling very sure of how readable the outcome will be.  But I must admit, there is a deeply seated need in us all not to be alone, to have someone to acknowledge us, to hear us, in this case, ‘read’ us.  

And here we come to the stumbling block.  There will eventually be reactions. Not all comments will be positive, as anyone who ever commented on anything online knows. Just the other day I commented on an article publicising the up coming Terminator film (hurrah) which will star Linda Hamilton, The Original Sarah Connor.  Awesome.  Until the author used this phrase: ‘…even if she is old…’.  What? What?! So I respond: “great article, but listen, I know she’s 62; but look at her, she looks totally kick ass. Let’s not label people here.”  Promptly I receive a response from someone with not-my-real-name, who says eloquently “she’s 62, so f*** off”.  Clearly I haven’t learned my lesson yet, so I respond in my most polite British manner: “I don’t dispute she’s 62; but disregarding her biological age, physiologically she looks awesome. And I’d prefer we do not label people based on their age, as we should not label them based on their gender, skin colour or beliefs”. To which this person responds “your fu**ing old”. Yep, with this spelling.  So I did the only adult thing possible: reported them for use of obscenity to FB and blocked them. 

My point here is, as I voluntarily enter the internet scary space, I will have to find ways to protect myself both in terms of online tools, and to armour my little soul. But even that is a fresh challenge to take on.  

So back to the original “why are you doing this, girl?” guestion. 

Because I want the intellectual challenge, to express my thoughts and ideas eloquently and engagingly (so the reader actually gets to the end at least).

Because I need the mental diversion, away from financials, PowerPoints and corporate speak.  

Because I choose to share who I am with people, who’s views I value. And should they choose to comment, I’m hoping they will be gentle. 

Because I want to do this, simple as that.  

Ok, I’m pushing the button…..